I get regular jokes and famous sayings which I realise are popular!
Hope you like these - maybe Sleaford needs them to forget the ASB>
I thought about an age old question: Is giving birth more painful than getting kicked in the Nuts?
Women always maintain that giving birth is way more painful than a guy getting kicked in the nuts.
Well, after some heavy deductive thinking, I have come up with the answer to that question.
Getting kicked in the nuts is more painful than having a baby; and here is the reason for my conclusion:
A year or so after giving birth, a woman will often say, "It might be nice to have another child."
On the other hand, you never hear a guy say, "You know, I think I would like another kick in the nuts."
I rest my case.
If you don't read the newspaper you are uninformed; if you do read the newspaper you are misinformed.
Mark Twain
Suppose you were an idiot. And suppose you were a member of Congress... But then I repeat myself.
Mark Twain
I contend that for a nation to try to tax itself into prosperity is like a man standing in a bucket and trying to lift himself up by the handle.
-Winston Churchill
A government which robs Peter to pay Paul can always depend on the support of Paul.
- George Bernard Shaw
A liberal is someone who feels a great debt to his fellow man, which debt he proposes to pay off with your money.
-G Gordon Liddy
Democracy must be something more than two wolves and a sheep voting on what to have for dinner.
-James Bovard, Civil Libertarian (1994)
Foreign aid might be defined as a transfer of money from poor people in rich countries to rich people in poor countries.
-Douglas Casey, Classmate of Bill Clinton at Georgetown University
Giving money and power to government is like giving whiskey and car keys to teenage boys.
-P.J. O'Rourke, Civil Libertarian
Government is the great fiction, through which everybody endeavours to live at the expense of everybody else.
-Frederic Bastiat, French Economist (1801-1850)
Government's view of the economy could be summed up in a few short phrases:
If it moves, tax it. If it keeps moving, regulate it. And if it stops moving, subsidize it.
-Ronald Reagan (1986)
I don't make jokes. I just watch the government and report the facts.
-Will Rogers
If you think health care is expensive now, wait until you see what it costs when it's free!
-P.J. O'Rourke
In general, the art of government consists of taking as much money as possible from one party of the citizens to give to the other.
-Voltaire (1764)
Just because you do not take an interest in politics doesn't mean politics won't take an interest in you!
-Pericles (430 B.C.)
No man's life, liberty, or property is safe while the legislature is in session.
-Mark Twain (1866 )
Talk is cheap...except when Congress does it.
-Unknown
The Government is like a baby's alimentary canal, with a happy appetite at one end and no responsibility at the other.
-Ronald Reagan
The inherent vice of capitalism is the unequal sharing of the blessings.
The inherent blessing of socialism is the equal sharing of misery.
-Winston Churchill
The only difference between a tax man and a taxidermist is that the taxidermist leaves the skin.
-Mark Twain
The ultimate result of shielding men from the effects of folly is to fill the world with fools.
-Herbert Spencer, English Philosopher (1820-1903)
There is no distinctly Native American criminal class...save Congress.
-Mark Twain
What this country needs are more unemployed politicians.
-Edward Langley, Artist (1928 - 1995)
A government big enough to give you everything you want is strong enough to take everything you have.
-Thomas Jefferson
No comments:
Post a Comment